Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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