question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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