Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
