just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
