Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I stole a fireplace last night.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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