HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
