You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
