id be glad to
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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