R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
