remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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