i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you win again, gameday.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
