thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
My vagina is officially offended.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Drunk is a universal language darling
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
