I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
