Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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