filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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