do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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