Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
