he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
