Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
