You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
The best walk of shames are on the highway
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
