It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Sext me about skeletons
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
God, I missed his penis.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
