p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I wish i was in the wii world.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
two words...techno handjob
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize
