doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I am spending my child support on dildos
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
