I'm going to jail i love you
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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