he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
i now understand why vodka
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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