Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize