I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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