It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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