My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize