Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
