recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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