she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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