so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
