Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize