ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
there was a trapeze. enough said
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
