And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
