she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Randomize
