You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize