The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
accomplished twins. life is a go
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize