quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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