he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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