I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
