He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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