well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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