she was so not down for the gang bang
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize