ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
i drank out of a bidet.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
