gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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