I love black thongs
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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