Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He shit in the fireplace
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
