but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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